Day 190

1 Chronicles 7:1-8:40; Acts 27:1-20; Psalm 7:1-17; Proverbs 18:22

Can I Be That Honest With Jesus?

The Lord judges the peoples;
    judge me, O Lord, according to my righteousness
    and according to the integrity that is in me.
Oh, let the evil of the wicked come to an end,
    and may you establish the righteous—
you who test the minds and hearts,^c]
    O righteous God!
My shield is with God,
    who saves the upright in heart.
God is a righteous judge,
    and a God who feels indignation every day.
– Psalm 7:8-11

After reading the Psalm over and over and thinking and a little bit of praying, the ah-ha moment began to sink in… What truth, actual faith, and free honesty! I found myself stopping and smiling for a minute at how true and honest the Bible is.

Next I find myself wrestling with the Psalmist over and over. Theologically, it is just a loaded passage, but at first glance, and at its deepest meditation, it is the eye-opening of a man who knew the love of God was as real as the grass he walks on everyday. A man who knew the depths of a Heavenly Father who has redeemed him from his sin and idolatry, and has overwhelmingly loved him and called him into his family.

It is not just a personal relationship with God… No, that does not describe it; it is giving us the Son’s relationship with the Father! That’s gospel! In response, here he is so free to be honest about wanting to know what is really driving his heart and actions. Who is he functionally trusting in and what privately matters most to him? And at last, so free to be honest that he unleashes prayers of anger, hostility, and frustration at those around him and his enemies… Do I know Jesus like that? Can I be that honest with Jesus?

Maybe walking with a God like that daily on a mission to see everything come back under His care and rule requires that the kingdom and its righteousness have days where I am screaming things I didn’t know possible to a Father who is big enough, self-confident enough, wise enough, and loving enough to handle them. He knows what to do with them – for me and for them. Be encouraged: the Father loves His children in Jesus, and you are free to be very passionate and very honest with him.

Chad Turner